I was raped and infected with HIV because I am transgender

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AUTHOR: Okun Oliech

I am a trans-woman living in Kisumu County and I am HIV positive. I dropped out of school when I was 13 years old because I was never at peace in there. Everyone was making fun of me.  Both teachers and students at my school used to say I was possessed with demons and I needed to be preached upon so that the demons in me that made me act like ladies could get out of me. Others kept saying I needed to see a doctor so that they could correct my condition and yet I wasn’t sick. I was frequently bullied in school and no one came to my rescue.

At home things were just the same as in school.  I could hear my parents argue at night in their room that I was a product of infidelity and that the gods had punished my mother by giving her an evil and cursed child. The community around me was so mean and heartless to me. They never even cared about how I felt as a human being. In fact they never saw me as a human being. To them I was like an animal.

I was raped twice by people whom I knew very well. They said they were trying to correct me so that I could become manly and straight. I reported the incident to the police but no action was taken. The guys that did this inhumane act to me were hostile to me and threatened to kill me. I was forced to run away from home and live in the streets.

Read more here.

#MondayMusings: Why Polygamy And Not Polyandry?

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While doing some research on the Marriage Act 2014, I came across this post that stated in part “However, Polyandry as well as same-sex marriages have not been given legal recognition under the Bill” and it got me curious about Polyandry.

Polyandry (/ˈpɒliˌændri, ˌpɒliˈæn-/; from Greek: πολυ- poly-, “many” and ἀνήρ anēr, “man”) involves marriage that includes more than two partners and can fall under the broader category of polyamory. More specifically, it is a form of polygamy whereby a woman takes two or more husbands at the same time.

After seeing that statement, I asked myself one question; how come polygamy is allowed and polyandry is not? And I went further and asked, are there places in the world that actually have polyandry happening?

Well at least most of us remember that case where two men agreed to share one woman, right? Apparently she had been torn over the two men for years and just couldn’t choose who to settle with and they came into an agreement that they will share her and the responsibilities of her house including taking care of the children. The story goes on to explain that their ‘unusual’ (actually, abnormal!) union would not stand in court unless the two men (yes, the two men!) proved that in their cultures polyandry was a common practice. Otherwise the union would be null and void.

Fascinating innit? That it is the men that would need to prove that they had such customs in their cultures and not the woman right? Like, even when she’s the one basically having two men pinning, nay, fighting over her, she still has no say over her ‘unusual marriage’.

What’s more is that one of the residents of Kisauni, where the three lived, said “We have never heard of something like this in Kenya, it is uncouth, untraditional unbiblical and against the holy books, including the Koran. Why on earth would a woman be shared by two men? They should be taken to court and punished,”.

I wondered therefore, whether there were any examples of polyandry in the bible and this conversation here just put it all in perspective. The bible basically does not recognise polyandrous unions. In fact, polyandry would have been an unheard of phenomenon, considering the fact that women were basically at the bottom of the lowest food chain there existed. Think about it, how many times did you hear the bible go “and he had two sons and two daughters named X, Y and Z”? It has always been that the boys were mentioned explicitly and the girls weren’t. If they were, it was simply a number. For example, ever wondered how come Adam and Eve only had sons? Didn’t they have daughters? Genesis 5 says that Adam and Eve had three sons, Cain, Abel and Seth and then goes on to say “and other sons and daughters”. LOL. 😒

But even then, Polyandry has been in existence in many cultures around the world. Polyandry in Tibet was a common practice and continues to a lesser extent today. In India they still practise it albeit in minority communities. It also happens in Nigeria, Namibia, among the Maasai in Kenya and Tanzania and some indigenous communities in America.

On a side note, there are several communities around the world that actually go further and have Matriarchal Systems; where the women of the
community literally ‘rule’ their world. 😀😀 The Mosuo, living near the border of Tibet are the most famous matrilineal society. There is no institution of marriage; rather, women choose their partners by literally walking to the man’s home and the couples never live together. Since children always remains in the mother’s care, sometimes the father plays little role in the upbringing. In some cases, the father’s identity is not even known. Instead, the male’s childrearing responsibilities remain in his own matrilineal household.

How’s that for an ideal society!? 😃 😄


Need more reading? See. These. Links. And the ones all over this post 🙂

Kasarani-Mwiki Road Being Fixed!

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Yup! My route is being fixed! Seems Kidero heard my plea, among many other pleas and came to the rescue.

**Photo coming soon**

Plans are underway for the fixing of the road and I heard that he said it was a ‘face value’ piece work since it is the responsibility of KENHA or some other government agency and not the Nairobi County Government. Meh! This politics will be the end of me.

Meanwhile, Hunters residents will have to bear with the numerous cars that have now been diverted through their street as the main road is being fixed.

Woi! Talk about dust and noise and all other crazyness!

In essence, we shouldn’t be complaining so much. We should keep putting pressure on those responsible to fix fix fix everything!

What else is happening? Barclays wants to charge more for loans? Shananae!!


#GratitudeChallenge Day Ten

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Phew! Just in time! It is 11:25pm and it is still day ten! LOL! Today’s list features some ‘Mashujaa’ tings I’d like to mention 🙂

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